Shopping for the soul

If you haven’t read Dr. John Gray’s book Venus on Fire Mars on Ice, you should. I just had Dr. John Gray on Sexy in Vancity Radio on Wednesday night (episode available here).  In our fast paced world, men and women’s lives are filled with stress.  This depletes testosterone in men and oxytocin in women.  If we can find ways to balance our hormones, according to Gray this is the key to life, love and energy.

Ladies, there is a reason we love to shop.  In his latest book Venus on Fire Mars on Ice, he explains shopping is a super-oxytocin producer which helps women reduce stress.  Before you grab your credit card and max it, spend some time taking stock of what is in your closet before hitting the shops.


  • RESEARCH. Grab a tea, post its and head over to Chapters. Head straight to the magazine section to select your favourite fashion magazines. Use your post its to mark which styles appeal to you. After going through several magazines, take note of what you like. Is there a similar colour scheme?  Does this look suit my life style? Am I a wash and wear kind of person or dry clean only? What looks are multi-purpose that can be worn from work to evenings out? What items of clothing do I already have hanging in my closet? Are there certain accessories that make the look work?
  • SPRING CLEAN. Go through your closet and see what pieces that might create a similar look to what you saw in the magazine. Separate pieces that might need to be fixed or dropped off at the dry cleaner. Be really honest with yourself  will you wear them. Make this a date with yourself and possibly a good friend who has great style. Decide which pieces you possess can help you create a new look. Decide which kind of pieces you need to add to your collection.
  • CLOTHING SWAP or CONSIGNMENT SHOP. Get your favourite gal pals together for a night of white wine and dress up. Perhaps going to see Sex in the City 2 afterwards might make the evening festive. Swapping garment for garment can be really fun. When you have done your research it is easier to pick out the pieces that add to your wardrobe. For the pieces that are not picked, make an appointment with your favourite consignment shop. Most consignment shops take 40 -40% of the price the garment sells for. The incoming monies can be put into a separate account for guilt free shopping trips.
  • MORE RESEARCH. Go online and check out the upcoming collections of your favourite designers and shops for the next few seasons. Thanks to you can see most of the shows from New York Fashion Week.
  • MORE CLOSET. Go back to your closet and see which pieces will carry you through the next few seasons. This way you are creating a look that is your personal signature.
  • LOG ONTO YOUR BANK ACCOUNT. Check your cash flow. See what you can afford to spend. By doing your research you are hopefully shopping as an investment.

The Shopping Day

Thinking of your day of shopping as a date with someone special – yourself.

  • Eat a light meal that will not cause bloating.
  • Dress up like you are going on a date.
  • Style your hair and apply fresh makeup * carefully blot your lipstick so it does not damage garments
  • Wear your favourite undergarments.
  • Pick out your favourite outfit and wear it shopping. Make sure it is something that is easy to change in and out of.
  • Wear fashionable but comfortable shoes.
  • Some shopping guides recommend wearing casual clothing. On a personal note, I think it is important to dress up. If I show up at a store wearing sweats, everything I try on is going to make me look better than when I came in.
  • Double check for stains, tears, zippers
  • Ask about return policies.

These tips are taken from the Glamcat’s Guide and have been used to teach women how to look like a million dollars without breaking the bank.


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